To be Interesting be Interested
Why are some people so damn interesting?
You know the ones.
They’re often surrounded by a group of captivated people. They seem to effortlessly build strong relationships with friends, family, community and business.
What is the one simple thing that sets these people apart?
They’re interested. And that makes them interesting.
They’re interested in you. They ask you questions. What are you currently working on? What are your projects? Future plans? What’s holding you back at the moment and how can they help you?
They ask you six questions before you realize you haven’t asked them one.
They follow up on their verbal promises. You hear back from them. They email you that contact. They schedule the introductory breakfast meeting. It’s not just talk to them. They walk the walk.
As you get to know them, their interest broadens.
They enquire about your wellbeing. Ask about your family. They remember your kids and the holiday you just got back from.
They attend your functions. Return your phone calls and emails. They support your causes.
The spirit of their interest is not driven by alternative motives or potential gain.
They are interested in you.
And everybody notices their interest and remembers it.
Now contrast this with some experiences I’ve had in recent years.
People that I have met a few times but have never asked me one question about me. They constantly talk about themselves. Or simply ignore me. I asked them several questions about themselves and showed genuine interest. Alas, I received nothing in return.
This is the essence of my point.
These experiences highlight the inverse of someone being interested – not being interested.
My feelings on these occasions were memorable but for all the wrong reasons. I was disappointed at a missed opportunity to connect. The behaviour was rude, boorish and poor form. But here’s the real kicker.
Unlike the guy who is interested in you, the person who shows scant interest is uninteresting and unmemorable.
People’s feelings on this are just as strong - positive or negative. How you play this will define you.
So it’s your choice.
I encourage you to not give up on being interested in people. You might feel like your batting 10-0 in the interest stakes. Just reflect on this later and move onto other interesting people.
Being interested makes you interesting.
How do you want to be remembered?
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Cheers, Darren K Bourke